A MUST READ!!! Ibn Qayyim: The Wisdom of Islamic Polygyny

Ibn Qayyim: The Wisdom of Islamic Polygyny

First, Ibn Qayyim addressed the wisdom in limiting the number of wives specifically to four:

“…so, this is from the completeness of His blessing and Shari’ah, and is in accordance with His wisdom, mercy, and benefit for His servants. This is because one of the purposes of marriage is sexual intercourse and the fulfillment of one’s desire, and from the people are those who are overtaken by their desire, and are not satisfied with one. So, He allowed him a second, third, and fourth one (i.e. three additional wives)…and the Legislator has attached numerous rulings to this number (three), as He has allowed the migrant to remain in Makkah for three days after completing his rituals, and allowed the traveler to wipe over his footwear for three days, and made the preferred length of hosting a guest to be three days…”

He then went on to explain the wisdom in allowing multiple spouses for the man, in exclusion to the woman:

“…this is from the completeness of the Wisdom of the Exalted Lord, and His goodness and mercy towards His servants, and His taking their interests into account, and He is Exalted above doing anything other than this, and His Shari’ah is far from coming with other than this. If it was allowed for the woman to have two or more husbands, the world would be ruined, and progeny would be lost, and the husbands would end up killing each other, and a crisis would ensue, and the fitnah would become severe, and war would erupt. And how can the affair of the woman remain firm when she has bickering partners? And how can the affair of these partners themselves remain firm? So, the coming of the Shari’ah with what it came with of opposition to this is from the greatest of proofs of the wisdom, mercy, and consideration of the Legisator.

So, if it is said: how can the interests of the man be taken into account, with his being able to marry whom he wants, fulfill his desire, and move from one woman to the next in accordance with his desires and needs – all while the needs of the woman are just like his needs, and the desires of the woman are just like his desires?

We answer: since it is the nature of the woman to be concealed behind the walls and hidden in the depths of her home, and her moods are cooler than that of the man, and her outer and inner movements are less than his movements, and the man has been given strength and intensity that leads his desire more so than with the woman, and he has been tested with what she has not been tested with, he is granted the choice of having multiple spouses that is not available to the woman. This is from what Allah has set aside exclusively for the male, and has preferred for them over women, just as He has preferred for them Messengership, Prophethood, Khilafah, kingship and leadership, governance, Jihad , etc. over women. Also, He has made men to be guardians over women, traversing about for the purpose of looking after their best interests, constantly on the lookout for means of sustaining them, encountering dangers, and exposing themselves to all types of hardships in the path of doing what is best for their wives. So, the Exalted Lord is Thankful and Forbearing, and He thanks them for this, and has compensated them by instilling for them what He did not instill for their wives.

And if you compare the fatigue, hardship, and efforts of the man in fulfilling the interests of the women with what the women have to endure of jealousy, you would find that the man’s share of having to endure this fatigue, hardship, and effort is much greater than what the women have to endure of jealousy…”

He continued:

“As for the one who says that the desire of the woman is even more than that of the man, this is not the case. The driving force behind the desire is fervor (lit. heat). So, where is the fervor of the woman in comparison to the fervor of the male? The woman – because of her free time, slowness, and absence of what will keep her busy from the fulfillment of her desire – might be overtaken by her desire, and will not find that which would oppose it. Rather, it finds a heart and soul free from distraction. So, it is able to instill itself within her to the utmost, resulting in one assuming that her desire is multiple times that of the man, and this is not the case.

And from that which proves this is that if a man has intercourse with his wife, he can have intercourse with other women in the same time frame, and the Prophet used to go around to all of his wives in a single night, and Sulayman went to 90 women in a single night, and it is known that with each woman, he displays desire and fervor that drives him to have intercourse. The woman, on the other hand, if the man fulfills his desire with her, she becomes exhausted, and does not seek to fulfill her desire with any additional man within that time frame.

So, the wisdom of of the Decree, Legislation, Creation, and Command is implemented, and praise is for Allah.”

[‘I’lam al-Muwaqqi’in’; 2/64-66]

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SUBHAN’ALLAH!!! The Ruling on Giving a Daughter in Marriage to One Who Does Not Pray

The Ruling on Giving a Daughter in Marriage to One Who Does Not Pray

Question:

One of my kin has proposed to my daughter and I am under an obligation to him, (for example, for having lent him money, or shown some kindness to him etc.) but he is addicted to alcohol and he keeps company with bad people and prays little, or does not pray at all. He is also addicted to watching videos and television and other time-wasting devices and I am in difficulty regarding him. I request clarification of the ruling of Islam in the matter.

Answer:

If the person proposing to your daughter is as you have described him, then it is not permissible for you to give her in marriage to him, because she is a trust in your hands, so it is incumbent for you to choose for her the most righteous man in his religion and his character.
It is not permissible for a person who does not pray to be married to a Muslim woman who does pray, since he is not a suitable match for her, because abandoning the prayer is an act of major disbelief, according to the saying of the Prophet sallallaahu alayhi was salam:

‘Between a man and polytheism and disbelief is the abandonment of prayer.’ (muslim no.82)

And the saying of the Prophet sallallaahu alayhi was salam:

‘The covenant between us and them is prayer; whoever abandons it has committed an act of disbelief.’ (At-tirmithi no. 2621)

Narrated by Imam Ahmad and the compilers of the Sunan, with an authentic chain of narrators.

There are many other evidences in the Book (of Allaah) and the Sunnah which prove the disbelief of one who abandons the prayer, even if he does not reject its obligation, according to the most correct of two opinions held by the scholars. However, if he rejects its obligation or mocked it, then he is guilty of major disbelief according to the consensus of the Muslims.

As for the one who drinks alcohol but prays, he is not guilty of disbelief by doing this, as long as he does not claim that it is permissible, but he has committed a major sin and he has gone astray thereby. Therefore, it is lawful for you not to give her in marriage to him, even if he prays, due to his sin and because he might lead his wife and children to this great crime.

We ask Allaah to improve the situation of the Muslims and guide them to His Straight Path, and to preserve us and them from obeying vain desires and Satan, for verily, He is Most Generous, Most Noble.

Shaykh `Abdul-`Azeez Bin Baz
Fatawa Islamiyyah, Darussalam, volume 5, pages 173/174

MUST READ!!! What is Allowed (Physically) to be Seen Between Husband and Wife

What is Allowed (Physically) to be Seen Between Husband and Wife

It is not Haraam (impermissible) for a man to look at anything from the body of his wife and neither is it the case in regards to the touching of it.
However; it has been said: that it is disliked to look at the private parts, and it has been said: that it is not disliked except at the time of sexual relations. And Allaah knows best.

Shaykh ul-Islaam Ibn Taymiyyah

Jaami’ al-Masaa’il le Shaikhil Islaam Ibn Taymiyyah Majmoo’ah ar-raabi’ah (book four in the series) page: 358
Translated by Aboo Haatim Muhammad Farooq

Oh Muslim Woman Shaykh Zayd Al-Madkhalee Hafidhullaah said:….

Oh Muslim Woman

Shaykh Zayd Al-Madkhalee (may allaah preserve him) stated:

“Oh Muslim Woman, indeed Allaah has created you in the best form. He provided you with the intellect, senses, and limbs, by which you have the ability to fulfill that which is obligatory upon you to fulfill and abandon that which you have been prohibited from, from every statement and action which calamity will befall. He (Allaah) has obligated upon you to attain understanding of the religion in order for you to establish that which Allaah has made you responsible for, in a manner that Allaah wants, the Lord of the Creation, as well as being upon the methodology that the most noble of the Prophets, the master of the Messengers came with, beginning with “Al-Fiqh Al-Akbar” and it is the Tawheed of The Lord of The Creation.”

Source: Ar-Risaalatul Qayyimah lil Mar-ah al-Muslimah pg. 22

MUST READ FAWAID!!! “Son of Adam; you seek the world as if your very life depended on it and you seek the Hereafter as if you have no need of it!…

“Son of Adam; you seek the world as if your very life depended on it and you seek the Hereafter as if you have no need of it! You will acquire what you need from this world even if you do not run after it, but you will only attain the Hereafter if you run after it. So be aware of your true condition!”

— Yahyaa Ibn Mu’aadh Al-Raazee

rahimahullaah [“The Journey Of The Strangers”, By Al-Aajurree, p. 67]

Yaa Rabb!!! Ibn Al-Jawzee Rahimahullah said: “When a person thinks about the life of this world before entering it, he considers it long….

Ibn Al-Jawzee Rahimahullah said:

“When a person thinks about the life of this world before entering it, he considers it long. Likewise when he thinks about it after leaving it, he sees a long period of time and knows that the stay in the grave is long. When he thinks about the Day of Judgement, he knows that its 50,000 years long, and when he thinks about Paradise and Hell. he knows that they will never end.

Now when he goes back to look at the time spent in this world, lets say 60 years, he can see that 30 of it is spent in sleeping, 15 or so is spent in childhood, and most of what is left goes to chasing after desires, food ad money. When he accounts for what if left, he finds that much of it is nothing but showing off and heedlessness.

The price of eternal life is the hours of his life, but what is left of them to buy it with?!”

He then goes on to mention:

“Days consists of hours and hours are made up of breaths you take. Every breath is a treasure chest, so beware of letting a breath pass by with no benefit. You do not want to find an empty treasure chest on the Day of Judgement and regret.

Indeed, a man once said to ‘Amir Ibn ‘Abd Qays (a Taabi’ee):

“Stop, I want to talk to you.”

So he said to him:

“Hold the sun in your hands [i.e. stop time] so I can talk to you.” “

[Taken from “Sincere Advice To Students Of Sacred Knowledge”, by Ibn Al-Jawzee, Pp.49 & 54-55]

The Muslim Woman Umm Salamah As-Salafiyyah (May Allaah preserve her)

The Muslim Woman

Umm Salamah As-Salafiyyah (may Allaah preserve her) stated:
And even though Islaam has indeed given the woman many rights, this doesn’t mean that Islaam has given her unrestricted freedom in the matter of entering, leaving out, making a dazzling display of oneself when out in public, and mixing with men. Rather, Islaam has prohibited the matter of leaving out of the home in abundance without there being a need.
Allaah said:

“And remain in your homes, and do not make a dazzling display of yourself like that of the first pre-Islaamic time of ignorance…”
(Soorah Al-Ahzaab: 33)

Source: Tahdheer Al-Fataa al-A’feefah min Talbeesaat Az-Zindaani al-Khabeethah by Umm Salamah As-Salafiyyah with theIshraaf and Taqdeem of Al-Imaam Abu Abdir Rahmaan Muqbil bin Haadi (may Allaah have mercy upon him) pg. 83